February 6, 2009

'Mom cooks me ... like a turkey'

A 4-year-old's heart is breaking because her Mom "doesn't love her anymore."

My heart breaks when I read that her mom put her in the oven and "cooks me like a turkey." I had hoped it was a misguided mother's attempt to get her daughter warm during this cold spell.

But that wasn't the goal of the Hamtramck's mom, who also singed her daugter's eyelid with a screwdriver,

I have so many questions. How could the girl stand still long enough for her mother to do that to her face?

How did the mother get her into the oven? Pretend they were acting out a fairytale? Shove her in?

I want to know more. I know that I can't. I fear others will follow the mother's lead.

Why is it still so easy for some to become parents.

It is enough to distract me from the horror of the new mother of 8 babies, who already is mother to six children. It is not the size of this new family or even that all of the kids are under 8. It's the mother and how unlikely it is that she will qualify as a good mother anytime soon.

She's been on disability for at least 5 years - pain from an on-the-job injury prevents her from working and led to her divorce in 2008. (She says depression from pain led to her marriage disolving. Is her ex taking the high road and not sharing his side, or is no one asking him?)

How much did birthing and -- I hope -- taking care of the first six contribute to her disabling pain. Why in the midst of the physical pain and emotional pain of splitting from your husband would you choose to have more children? And what sane medical staff agreed to do the procedure?

Why is it so easy for some to become and stay parents?

It is almost enough to make me want to stop reading the news.

3 comments:

  1. As some one who wanted kids but never had the luck (or money) my first reaction to this kind of horror is if they do not want to give the child love we do!
    Britain has had a whole series of extreme child abuse cases from incestious fathers repeatedly impregnating his daughters to "Baby P" in London who was tortured to death by his half brained nazi step father while his mother was on social networking sites.
    Maybe I would have been a lousy dad- who knows.
    Do you remember Frank Zappa discovery Larry "Wildman" Fisher?
    He was a mental health patient who made few very strange records. One song made me cry, he screams "Oh Lord please give me a kid" he then lists all the grat things he will do with the kid. Then he screams how he will love that kid and never leave it and never hurt it "So he don't grow up screwed up like me"
    Lucky Fisher could not produce his own litter of children- even with fertility drugs! but I reckon he had a better philosophy of parenting than many.

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  2. It takes all kinds, or so they say. Too bad some of those kinds are abusive -- to their own children, to others' kids or to anyone.

    And after reading Richie's post, too bad some kinds cannot have children.

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  3. Richie:
    You are so right about the wrong people becoming parents. I once was told I could not have children so my daughter was a big surprise. Even though she is almost 25, I still want to protect her.

    I hope you have found a way tv have children in your life, even if they are not of your life.

    Vicki
    Sometimes it seem so unfair that those who really want children and could raise them with love are left without.

    Thanks Richie and Vicki for stopping by
    M

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