Blogger writes about Conversations that Matter, while others use Twitter

The National Girl Scout Convention is getting some attention outside the walls.
Jack Martin Leith talks about the Conversations That Matter, learning about them through a post by Christine Whitney Sanchez, on the Open Space Technology e-list.

Jack quotes Christine:

"The 900 person Open Space for Sharing and Learning has just concluded with members posting 62 topics over two sessions. Picture girls standing at the microphones, thanking the adults for truly listening to them and adults tearfully expressing their passion and gratitude for everything they learned. Lisa Heft did a magnificent job of holding the space and inviting new thinking."

He also Twittered several times about Girl Scouts, including these Tweets

@skap5 says" K Cloninger CEO of Girl Scouts flipped business model on its head." Membership orgs?

Girl Scouts of the USA model participatory democracy using Open Space, World Cafe & Appreciative Inquiry. www.jackmartinleith.com/?p=... about 14 hours ago from web

Also excited to be here is PJClou9 from Minnesota, who tweeted just a few minutes ago:

"Having fun at Girl Scout convention!"

Early her Tweets included this:

"Hoping everyone's Halloween festivities are ready to roll. I am going to eat dinner than Wii w/Girls Scouts til 8. "

Here's another Tweet:

skap5: @jackmartinleith I spoke with Kathy Cloninger CEO of Girl Scouts recently and she is fantastic. Flipped the business model on its head.
And another:


brandologist: Went to opening ceremonies of Girl Scouts annual convention tonight. Mayor Ballard read proclamation of today as Girl Scouts day.


CMCMediaGroup: covering the girl scouts convention

Did I miss anyone?

This originally appeared in Convention Talk, a discussion board set up by the national Girl Scouts organization.
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Big blow: Daughter, 24, has cancer

It's getting tiring to hear how unexpected it is for a 24-year-old to have cancer. To fight the insurance battles so soon. And to know how fast we must act.

I left Michigan on Sunday to drive to Indiana to get ready for the Girl Scout Convention, where a project was to drive Conversations That Matter and get girls to become digital storyweavers.

On Wednesday afternoon, I got the unbelievable news that my daughter has breast cancer. For the rest of the day, the phrase "first, you cry" came to mind as the tears just kept coming. I knew they needed to be out of my system before I made it to Tennessee where my daughter now lives.

The people I had been working with were wonderful - understanding why I had to leave and several people added to their jobs and new ones stepped up to take over some of the things I had taken on.

They also quickly provided support in numerous ways, making sure I ate, rested and surrounded with hugs and love.

I drove from Indy to Tennessee, through construction and detours, stopping frequently to stretch, and rewarded by being able to hug my daughter.

Today, we spent at the Hope Cancer Center learning how much we don't know yet and getting scared by what we know. One thing for sure is that it is aggressive and treatment needs to start ASAP. But first, we need to know more:

Is the cancer in one place? That requires more tests, which the insurance company says it must precertify the need first.

Did the pathologist have more information and it is just the fax that is missing it?

Yet, the doctor was frank: surgery, chemo and radiation is necessary. What's left is how much and when. And for that we need some of the blood results back, an MRI and a cat scan done.

Looks like we have found another good reason I took the buyout. I can now live in Tennessee and help my daughter survive choosing a doctor, a treatment plan and then living through it. Perhaps I can find a way to stop the weight loss, the pain.

Perhaps, my being here will help my daughter - already determined she will fight and win. In fact, she went to work today at her pizza place. She's swamped with customers, can barely stay awake and yet says she needs work to help her focus.

Much in the same way, I'm trying to help with the Girl Scout convention long distance.

But mostly, I still want to cry at the unfairness even as I know nobody ever said life was fair.

Open Space starts with listing ideas

The idea of self organizing through Open Space fascinates me. It's the ultimate in showing democracy rules, that the crowd is wise.

The people present at Open Space determine what will be discussed during the session. Before I left Indy for a family emergency, Gabriel Shirley took time from his from his Digital Production and Digtial StoryWeaving duties to give me a quick tour and explanation of Open Space.

I watched girls and women go to a table, pick up a note that listed the issue they wanted to talk about, announce it over a microphone and then go post it on the "wall."

Later, I took a few minutes to look over some of the topics that people wanted to talk about and had posted on the wall. I was glad that someone took this photograph to help me preserve this memory.

I heard lead facilitator Lisa Heft announce that the enthusiasm of the group meant Open Space volunteers had to expand the number of topic groups. That was exciting. so was seeing girls among the adults.

Volunteers are working to transcribe the discussion and plans created by self-organizing groups. I'm hungry for information from the convention floor as well as from open space.

Originaly posted in Convention Talk, a new discussion board for the national Girl Scouts organzation.

GS Central unfolds in Indy

It's been inspiring to watch the Indy convention center unfold into Girl Scout Central.

The city too! I came back to my hotel tonight to discover a request to share my unused lotion, shampoo, etc. by putting it in the provided Girl Scout bag for a local service project

Speaking of donations ... got time to help some of us transcribe what happens at Open Space (a few spots left - register at 8 Thursday). Stop by StoryWeaving Cental anytime after 3:30 Thursday. That transcribing will take awhile so if you can't make it Tursday stop by another day.

We also want to share results from conversations. If you are willing to text for those who can't stop by, get a Ask Me About texting sticker. During or after the business meeting just text when asked, see if a conversation supporter (in aprons) has collected written thoughts by non- texters that you can text or stop by StoryWeaving Central to see what we have collected.

You will be able to see texting results live on screens at convention and via a web site plus on some printouts.

Oh and we are looking for people who were at 2005 convention to interview. Plus we need folks willing to journal about this year's convention.

We have other needs posted on site. Stop by. Say hello!

Originally posted in Convention Talk, a discussion board created by the national Girl Scouts.

Meet a StoryWeaver

A big part of the effort at the Girl Scouts annual convention is to use story to connect people.

In Convention Talk, the online discussion board for Girl Scouts, I wrote:

Remember back in July 2008 when the first Convention Connections newsletter was distributed to Girl Scout Councils and posted on the convention web site. One article suggested we practice story-telling by thinking about our own Girl Scout experiences, including leadership lessons and special people who had an impact on our lives.


In the past three months, I've "met" some incredible people by becoming involved in the StoryWeaver project. (I put met in quotes because those meetings have happened over the phone and on the web.) And I love hearing, reading and seeing their stories, especially their Girl Scout stories.


One of the first people I "met" was Gabriel Shirley But Christine Whitney Sanchez was the second.


I've been inspired to do a little weaving thanks to Lou Creber, who was heading up the Story Looms and organizing the Elders and Greeters. Unfortunately, Lou won't be in Indy.


I did get to meet Nancy Moeller, when I went to Macy and did some practice texting and worked with three girls who used borrowed video cameras to interview adults about their Girl Scout leadership stories. (Watch for the videos soon, and watch for the girls in Indy.)


Meanwhile, keep coming back through the convention.


UPDATE: Lou did make it to convention - she arrived on Wednesday. I still didn't get to meet her as I had to leave to be with family. (Yes, before the official opening of the convention. Thank goodness for the Internet)

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So many firsts: Some alarming, some scary

It's not often I get to have so many firsts on the same day/night. Let's see, 3 a.m. false fire alarm at hotel, a few scary phases and then all those new people. I survived.

We'll go backwards and start with the fire alarm that sounded at 3 a.m. in the hotel. I was almost ready to make the trip down to the stairs when the announcement came on and said it was false. Nice wakeup call.

Of course, I'm wondering if it is related to the problem of no hot water earlier today at the hotel.

Earlier in the day, I finally got to meet with some folks who really made the last three months of my life beyond interesting. I've talked with them on the phone (almost daily in some cases), exchanged lots of emails (definitely daily) and txted some (including sending one a message meant for my husband (must be careful).

Still despite that Dale Carnegie class, despite hosting a radio show, despite speaking on stage before thousands, was I ready to walk in the lobby and say hey? (They have all met before).

They didn't bite. Well, not at least until dinner.

The day started off scary - seems that a prescription is missing. I unpacked everything - including the stuff I packed for the time I'll spend in Tennessee. Nothing. My theory is the dog ate the pills, grabbing the box during the round of packing. Whatever. That left me with finding a way to get refills. (OK, first I debated skipping the prescription, but since I already skipped the flu shot I thought that might be too scary.)

I don't like it, however, when the concierge tells me "I should be safe there."

Actually, there was no reason to be scared of the drugstore or meeting the folks I could never call strangers. Dinner was much more of a family affair.

Study: Txting helps parent-teen relationship

I think I already knew this but it's nice to have some confirmation - even if the study was funded by a phone company.

Sometimes, it pays to clean out the files from your computer. I'm trying to make sure I'll have lots of space for video, text messages and other items from the Girl Scout national convention so I'm tossing a few things.

I re-discovered a study released in April that found that parents who text may have a better relationship with their teens:

• More than half (53%) of teens that text message think their relationship with their parents has improved because of text messaging.
• More than half (51%) of parents who text with their teens agree that they communicate more often with their kids now than they did before they began text messaging and that text messaging has actually improved their relationship.

The survey, commissioned by Samsung Mobile, was conducted by Kelton Research and included 300 American teens ages 13 – 19 and 500 American parents with children ages 13 – 19.

A press release on the survey is available. So is a video with teens and parents talking more about why they text.


originally posted in ConventionTalk, a discussion board created on the national Girl Scout web site to discuss the national convention/meeting of delegates.

Helicopter or chicken soup mom: How do you decide

Struggle time - just when should a mom drop everything to be with her daughter? Is support from miles away enough? Or should I leave this event and drive six hours to be next to her just in case the biopsy finds cancer?

But what if the results are not in? If it's not cancer?

Am I listening to the words and missing the meaning when she says "please, wait to come."

Will it be enough to wait by the phone? To send warm, encouraging thoughts.

Oh mom, what should this mom do?.

I voted - but it wasn't easy getting a ballot

Unbelievable is the only way to describe the way the absentee ballot system runs in Grand Blanc Township, near Flint, Michigan.

I'm heading out of town and originally expected to return the day before the election.

My daughter will soon get a biopsy so I want to extend my trip - by days and places - and spend some time with her.

It is a last minute decision, so I stopped by my local government office to get an absentee ballot. That's when the unbelievable part started.

I needed the paper ballot now, not mailed to me at the house I wouldn't be at until after the election. I also didn't want it mailed to a hotel.

Instead, I was told that legally it was impossible to give me a ballot now.

As I pressed the issue, I was told that it would be too confusing to do it now but I could call the next day, make an appointment and come in to get a ballot. And no, I couldn't tell her what time I was coming the next day, I had to call the next day.

By the time, I reached my car I was fuming. First call went to the county election department - very helpful. She led me to the state elections department. In between, a search of regulations and court rulings.

The county and state were sure I had heard wrong and the state even called the township to clarify.

I got my ballot. It took a while - long enough for one official to have a long discussion with me about how busy they are and can't really provide a ballot to every person who wants one on their time.

A steady stream of people came in and out during the two hours I was there. Each filled out the required absentee ballot request and patiently nodded when told the ballot would be mailed to them. Guess we have money to burn in my local government as we certainly wouldn't want to save on postage by handing them a ballot.

So a future fight, on another day I blackened the holes; let's see if it gets counted.

Faith: The bigger picture

I collect quotes - for inspiration, for cards, for journaling, and now for blogging. I was stopped by what one mother said about her son's recovery in a recent newspaper article.

The 14-year-old was hit by a car while riding his bike. The mother was praying. And though she hoped for recovery, that is not what she prayed for:

"I wanted God's will to be done no matter what it was because he knows my son better then I know my son....he knows what kind of life (Chris is) going to live - I don't.

Kelly Thornsberry, who was quoted in The Flint Journal on Oct. 19, 2008, page A4, has the bigger picture in mind. She reminds me once again that our children are not ours, no matter how much we would like to think they are.

It's a tradition: Change and griping

"What Happened to the Girl Scouts" is the headline on a magazine article that comes up in an Internet search. I'm amazed that mass media has picked up on the changes, an undercurrent of dissatisfaction in Girl Scouts.

Will it be about the merging of councils, the changing of programs, or lambasting the values? Is it pegged to the 51st National Council meeting in Indianapolis Oct. 29-Nov.2?

It is a look at values - the downplaying of international relationships. It is a look at changes - a handbook revised just 11 months after being published.

Nice - an article written in 1955 - has words that connect with today's Girl Scouts.

What pops out for me in the May 1955 Atlantic article is this:

"Every six or seven years the Girl Scouts completely revise their manual. In between - ordinarily the book remains the same during additional printings except for minor typographical corrections."

So change is a tradition.

"Yet less than a year after the first printing, more than sixty changes were ordered. Some expressions were toned down, strong sympathies diluted, and a few plain facts erased."

So revision is a tradition.

Author Ben H. Bagdikian, "one of the first to be alarmed by the policy of retreat disclosed in the article which follows" carefully looks for evidence that Girl Scouts, the organization, has changed its thinking, its values. He cites examples like this:

"The old Handbook said, "Scouts and Guides all over the world are known for their willingness to help other people." In 1953 the "all over the world" was dropped."

So debating the inclusion or exclusion of a phrase in documents is a tradition.

Today's hot topic on the Internet e-mail lists is that "they" are against "unhealthy traditionalists."

The phrase - an obstacle to changing a program - is found in a table cell in a "Strategic priority" document shared with a Yahoo group on Feb 16, 2008:

"There is an unhealthy devotion to traditions on standards, uniforms and
awards."

Another shares that she saw the phrase as "an unhealthy attachment to tradition" in a PowerPoint she was forced to watch. Later, someone sends out a PowerPoint from an annual meeting where it was held.

Now, a group has ordered shirts that say Unhealthy Traditionalist: Eat 2 Thin Mints and call me in the morning."

I'd prefer to push for the positive: Healthy Traditionalist: Eat 2 Thin Mints and call me in the morning (Can you be healthy eating thin mints?) because I think traditions are healthy.

But then I think debate is healthy and so is change.

"Have the Girl Scouts themselves changed? Have they altered their basic ideas about international friendship and the United Nations?

Nothing of the sort. The Girl Scouts of America was and is a fine organization which still encourages idealism, good citizenship, and international friendship. What happened in 1954 was that the Girl Scouts in the forty-second year of their existence decided it was no longer safe to say so too plainly."

Another section in the article also makes me smile:

"The (1954) pamphlet correcting the new 1953 Handbook was filled with instructions like: -

"Page 86. Change the sentence beginning with Line 2 to read: 'Service is your way of making a contribution to your community." A few months before, it had read: "Service is your way of making this a better world in which to live."

In 2008, we are back to "Girl Scouting builds girls of courage, confidence and character who make the world a better place."

Traditionalists, after all.

What's best? Mashed, baked or hash brown potatoes

Pulling someone's dream into yours or yours into theirs is like dealing with spuds.

I just can't decide which way is best.

Should you strive for mashed potatoes, peeling the skin to see what is inside, cooking each individual piece to the right degree, then throwing them under the mixer with just a bit of milk and butter.

Can you live with lumps? Or do you keep beating until everything, everyone is on the same page.

Or do you leave the skin on, knowing the richness it can provide, and throwing each into the oven to slowly become done. There, a place where you can still identify the individual pieces to be selected and eaten individually

Or is the skin not the issue? Leave it on or leave it off, but dice each potatoe before tossing together in the well-seasoned pan to create a dish that speaks loudly of individuals but draws it's strength from the mixture.

What happens when you take on the chef's role near the end of the project? Past the time of dreaming together and nearer the time of it must be done.

I wonder why i was I supposed to know there were pictures in your head. Or that easels shed pages filled with sketches that explained concepts some believe were magically implanted in my brain.

Did I maneuver the group plan to fit my dream because I was the one willing to use the tools? Did I let the all positive affirmations drown out the collection of no's and maybes.

Yet, now I have enough time in to see the pattern of how some can complete, compete, and/or critique only when the work is almost done. Some need an almost finished structure before they see the possibilities which, of course, means redoing

Quotes of resistance being a part of the story strengthen the one told by my body as the leg starts to wobble and the mind escaped into mush.

I hear again folks telling me chaos is expected, to be prepared for surprises.

Right now I am thinking of skipping the potatoes.

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Finding results not always easy

My journalism background helped me reply to a post on GSUSA's newly launched discussion board.

Girl Scouts elect and send delegates to a National Council meeting every three years. In 2005, many came early to participate in Open Space. There's another Open Space to kick off the meeting this year. Some are asking why repeat it if there's no evidence of results from the 2005 conversations.

That evidence had started being discussed in another thread. Plus there's a video final report that I think shows someone was listening.

And I think in all parts of our lives the only assurance we have that issues we bring up won't be ignored is if we take the responsibility for making sure they are not.

Here's the rest of my reply:

I wasn't there in 2005. But as a "recovering journalist," I know I often was/am frustrated when trying to follow up on the success or failure of a project because:

• No one kept track of what happened after the big campaign, or the community discussions.
  
• Or I couldn't find out who was keeping score
  
• Or that person couldn't share the results
  
• Or the outcomes weren't measurable. For instance, how do you measure influencing a person's thought process?

Do we know if something said at the 2005 Open Space triggered an idea or action months later? Did seeing what happened at Open Space lead to the concepts of Open Space being used to solve another problem?

I ended by saying I hope we hear from folks about the 2005 and 2008 conversations here so we can all share what we know.

Yet, I don't expect many responses because I don't think people connect what was said in 2005 with actions in 2008. I'll base that on years of watching too committees coming up with plans to breathe life into downtowns.
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Did I stumble by asking?

If you think someone is smart, do you ask if they social bookmark?

Or is that intrusion?

Is it better to search through digg, delicious, stumble it etc. on your own?

I don't mine sharing (should I be deleting the ones I am no longer want? Or never go back?)

Quick, I need help.

Even Girl Scouts have stories to tell

My buyout-funded sabbatical is turning into an amazing adventure of story-telling, crowdsourcing and surprises.

Helping to start the discussion board for the Online News Association's convention in September was so simple compared to launching a discussion board for the upcoming convention of the Girl Scouts.


The Girl Scout board is part of an effort called StoryWeaving and it should surprise no one that someone soon posted a question asking what StoryWeaving is anyways.

Here's my answer from there:

"I've asked the woman who is leading the StoryWeaving idea at this convention to also answer but I wanted to share my thoughts as a long-time Girl Scout and "retired" journalist who volunteered to help via the convention web site in late July.

When I first heard the term "StoryWeaving", I thought people would collect stories from Girl Scouts of all ages and then share them at convention, in new trainings, web pages, wikis, etc.

I expected to tell - and hear - stories about times when I saw the guiding principles of Girl Scouts in action ... those times I remember because they keep me in Girl Scouting when I'm neck-deep in the parts of the movement I don't like.

Since then, I've learned that type of story-telling, story-sharing and story-swapping will happen but it is just a part of StoryWeaving.

StoryWeaving is more then "once upon a time." It's real conversations about things that matter to us, the members of the organization. It's using techniques (methods?) to draw out the thinking, the wisdom of the crowds.

StoryWeaving will give us the chance to talk about leadership and the Stewardship Report.

StoryWeaving will let us share ideas about what we think is essential if the Girl Scout organization really is going to be (and be recognized) as the best organization for girls, Another acitivity should get us thinking about what we do next. (That we, by the way is the organization, the councils and the individuals.)

I think StoryWeaving tries to fix what happens at most of the conferences and conventions I go to - the brilliant ideas and best solutions come from conversations that happen in the hallways, the lobby, and over a meal.

I can't (yet) explain all the terms to you - Open Space, World Cafe, Appreciative Interviews, Digital StoryWeaving, etc. But I've already seen how powerful we become by using the wisdom of the crowd.

And I end with what is my biggest surprise: the Discussion Board. I've wanted the membership organization to tap the advice, the wisdom of at least its Internet-using Girl Scouts ever since we first had an AOL home that became a listserv (That's WAGGGS-L, still a listserv, still running - I know because I'm still the moderator.)

Wait until I tell you about arming teenage girls with video cameras or building wikis or ...

Update:Sometimes, I hate the written word because can't see reactions and there are no followup questions. Some saw the above as negative. I was trying to say that maybe this discussion board is a success story from 2005.

The reasons I diid not believe such a board was possible five weeks ago is my experience outside Girl Scouts.

This is the third time in 15 months that I have been involved in helping a non-profit organization start a discussion board. This was the fastest operation.

Even in an all-volunteer organization using free software, it can take months. There are technical, financial, and legal, issues. Plus there are things like what to call it, getting everyone on the same page, training moderators (I can go on)

So yes , there was a a discussion board set up for the proposals. There were plans to seek topics for one of the conversations through the web somehow.

But there was no budget or staff in place for an all-member ConventionTalk board - our own virtual open space

Actions speak. ConventionTalk shows a commitment to listening and a willingness to using technology

(a public thankyou to the WAGGGS-L listserv beta-testers,, and GSUSA staff and volunteers who moved at the speed of light to launch this)
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ONA08 job fair was fun!

I'm not handing out the resumes - yet, but I was in the Online News Association's Job Fair room all morning as an ONA volunteer.

Recruiters from AP, NPR, Washington Post, Congressional Quarterly and others were interviewing folks. (Anyone hired yet?)

Amy Adkins, who coordinated the job fair, is amazingly good with names. Folks who had mailed her resumes for the recruiters would come in and she knew they were on the job fair list without even consulting it. And that was without sleep the night before.

The Q&A on positioning yourself in the marketplace was interesting. Some discussion about copyediting, changing newsrooms and advice - "Get to work on time." I couldn't hear all of the discussion because I was staffing the welcome table right then and answering questions. But I heard that advice loud and clear.

Some lucky ones got to sign up for a one-on-one resume critique by former Detroit Free Press recruiter Joe Grimm, who didn't make the Q&A session because he was working one of his new jobs. He sent a great handout – My Career 2.0, advice for journalists in a changing environment. (Be bold, pick up the pace, be entrepreneurial, be a leader, build networks, and geek out.)

By the way, it wasn't my purse that was lost. I just sent out the announcement on Twitter. Isn't it nice that the purse was found and that job candidate will be able to fly home (yes, her purse had her ID, $$ and credit cards.)

And isn't it nice that folks like Brian Henderson will buy a volunteer a cup of coffee and Reginald Stuart shared info on how someone can own Helen Thomas' White House typewriter. (See http://www.sdxdc.org before Sept 19).

Originally posted in the ONA forum "Discuss the Pre-Conference Workshops"

What do you do? Pulver gives me an idea

It's on my mind as I get ready to head into a bunch of conferences. How do I tell people what I do.


Fortunately, I'm not the first who doesn't know what to say when asked What do YOU do?

So Jeff writes:

"When you attend a networking event and are meeting people for the first time, my observation is that the people who are “professionals” who are working in their chosen profession have it easier than others introducing themselves since most people have a general understanding what an: Accountant, Actor, Artist, Director, Doctor, Lawyer, Writer, ... does.

But if your chosen profession is slightly off the beaten path, what do YOU say? How do YOU describe yourself? How do you answer the question, “What Do YOU do?” How much information do you give of yourself to a total stranger when asked? "

Tough question to answer for a person on a buyout-funded sabbatical because as Jeff says “It is not about what I did but what do I do.”

Many woman who have elected to stay home have faced that question over the years. A woman who has never had a job tells me she tells folks she is a painter. She is because she paints.

A sister-in-law echos Pulver without ever reading him, saying it is tough to decide which role to share. It depends on the moment, where she is, and the mood. Perhaps she is a writer. Or a teacher. Or a mother.

Pulver, too, falls back on roles defined in a professional world even as he understands what else he might say:

"Rarely do I tell people that I’m a dreamer. That I love to look into the future and explore the unknown. That I believe in karma. And in having a heart."

"... my desire to challenge the status quo ..."

I wish more people would tell me things like that when we meet.

Doesn't it matter that I want women to trust technology and believe you don't criticize if you're not willing to help fix the problem?

Wouldn't you rather know I collect old linens to recycle into collaged hangings that rarely get finished? Or transfer dreams from ideas into reality?

Does it help to know I'm not working now? That I'm - gulp - retired even though I'm busier then ever before.

Or shall I just watch your eyes smile when I tell you I'm not working right now.

Beyond the buyout, beyond the bylines for journalists

I started this list of things to help me know others went on to new careers after the newsroom. Some left early, some left later. All are still living. Some happily every after.

Let's start with the St. Louis Magazine that took a look at 20 who left in 2005 in: They took the buyout and now some provide a community site that has moved.

Some choose to write out on their own. Here are two:

• Mike Himowitz writes MikePluged In (Updated: In April 2009, we learned he's now deputy managing editor of MedPage Today, an online site that brings breaking medical news to doctors and medical professionals.
  
• Downing's Views j are those of a journalist turned blogger. He often writes of politics, but he expands the topics sometimes.
  

Blog helps track ex-workers

A number of journalists from the Toronto Sun keep up with each other and the newspaper at the Toronto Sun Family blog.

Some folks move on - a film on the effects of buyouts. Update: The DVD is available now. The film description says "takes viewers inside disheartened newsrooms to document the devastation and into the community to learn what readers think of journalism’s fate."

A former newspaper photographer, Heather S. Hughes, writes about what he doesn't miss now that she's a wedding photographer.

"I don’t miss putting my heart and soul (and personal time) into a story that I thought was important to tell, only to see the photos never run in print and get posted online three days late, while getting no feedback or appreciation from anyone."

She also wrote about starting your own business, sharing what she learned in creating her photography business.

Former newspaper columnist and Hugo Award winner John Scalzi tells Eat, Sleep and PublishGood writers will always make a living Meanwhile, he's blogging at Whatever.

Find your own description

Some find different words to label the separation - hey, I've gotten used to buyout-funded sabbatical for me.

"Today begins what I call my "Katharine Weymouth Fellowship," and what the Post calls a "voluntary retirement incentive package." It was announced a scant month after the new publisher took over in February. This was her first buyout, but the paper's third in five years, owing to declining circulation and tanking ad revenue"

says Annie Groer in After the buyouts, the goodbye.

"In return for leaving, I got an adequate chunk of cash, an inadequate pension and a shot at re-invention. (Insert cheery boilerplate here...."I look forward to this new chapter of my life. I have several projects and a book to finish blah blah blah.")"

What some co-buyout-ers from the Washington Post are doing:

• Sue Schmidt is now at the Wall Street Journal
  
• Rick Weiss join the Center for American Progress.

The Huffington Post has more details, including photos.

Making your place in the world

And though Joe Grimm of the Detroit Free Press hasn't even left yet, he certainly has put together an afterlife with books on diverse topics like folk music and newspaper images, a blog on online recruiting and a visit to his first unconference. (Update: Joe left, started teaching in August 2008 at Michigan State University, among other things.)

When the paychecks stop, inspiration might come from this post on tips for being on the dole. Besides learning that beagles do not make good assistants, you'll learn about setting up your office and where to spend your time. (Hint: Networking). SB Anderson has started his own company since writing the post.

Watch out for you

Or perhaps a reminder to focus on self care when cutting the corporate cord.

Leaving the Working World? Watch Out For PISS: Post-Institutional Stress Syndrome by Elizabeth Coleman.

This post was updated Aug. 3, 2009, to update links and where some folks are today.

Stalking or starving? Your status now

I remember watching two men watching me, tracking me. In some shadows, my heart can still race.

I eagerly await status of folks I rarely see, partly for assurances they are still there, partly for a pause that refreshes.

Is the craving to know stalking? Or just starving for interaction?

Two bloggers I follow write about seemingly separate ideas, but somehow my mind links them to this stalking/starving idea.

Louis Gray outlines a relationship highlighting why being polite may not always be right as he talks about a potential web friendship that turned bad.

Gray was being polite and answered a number of comments, emails. But he watched a relationship with potential sour as the man's attitude changed. Without knowing the other person - did he expect more speedy responses? was he misled by the intimacy the internet can create? did he forget that text leaves no room for body language?

Over on GotBeeler, there's the sharing of Facebook statuses as an art. He cites some folks he thinks have a knack for using a 140 characters or so for delivering a universal truth, a puzzle of words that promote a smile, a combination that makes you pause to ponder.

As I read through his choices, I realize that I'd like to follow some folks so that I could benefit from these pearls. Yet, in no way, could I ask them to be my Facebook friends.

It helps me realize, though, how I do count on some people for their updates - David Armano who reminds me of the pleasure of motorcycle riding and enjoying life, Michael Stobbe whose puns make me groan, Hassan Hodges who shares the delights of a growing child and changing workplace. Beeler too.

In describing the artful way some update their statuses, Beeler notes that some rely on their children for help. And though Beeler moans that his children don't give him clever lines, I realize that all children do - it is just that some of us don't recognize the good lines. Or know how to use them.

Beeler notes:

"These artists take the mundane update of where they are or what they are doing and routinely add a li’l somethin’ somethin’ to it. They make checking status updates every 5 minutes worthwhile."

So, inside out, is it stalking if you only read statuses and rarely contribute your own? Is it stalking to add strangers you know only via their blogs or web postings? Is it stalking to add colleagues from across the miles when you know there will never be a face to face meeting?

Or is it starving for a link to someone else, a safe relationship with low expectations.

Now what? Potential helicopter mom worries about fillling empty nest

My daughter wants to come back to Flint.

And once again, my copy of Dr. Spock's baby book seems to be missing the chapter that could prevent me from becoming the next helicopter parent. (You know, the parent who hovers over her child to ensure all is right with her world. You can do that to a 24-year-old, right?)

Broken promises in the workplace had started her thinking about next moves. Her boyfriend's work week was slashed from full time to 32 hours. Her company opened stores in other communities, but no work was done on what was to be her store. Weekly crisis mean no time for her to do different things.

At first, the questions revolved around the delicate balance of seeking new jobs as a newcomer in a small town without losing your present jobs.

Then, the focus switched to a new job in a state with work. Texas? Nevada? Massachusetts?

I thought the rumblings of returning to Michigan were the after effects of her recent nine-hour road trip here. Good times with family and friends filled the brief visit.

Scheduling the rest of her vacation time led her to realize she would not be here for the family reunion, Thanksgiving or Christmas. She would miss more memory-making times.

It is another memory sparked by a Facebook status update of two girls returning home from camp that helps me understand what's really happening. My daughter may live somewhere else, but Flint, Michigan, is still home.

I remember the first postcards from summer camp, the ones that plead to be picked up now, that beg to be rescued from a miserable life, that assure us her counselors are the meanest people in the whole world.

Then, I knew the proper response was to wait for the homesickness to pass. By the end of camp, this sad experience would become the best days of her life.

Now, I'm not sure if I should keep encouraging her to find a job first or invite her to crash here while searching for a job within commuting distance.

Do I listen to Spock once again, knowing I won't "spoil the child" by picking her up when she cries (silently this time) or listen to the elders who suggest strength develops when children learn to soothe themselves?

I replay a comment from yesterday's family reunion:

"It's hard for someone who doesn't come from a family like yours to understand the loneliness of being far away."

The observation slips in as we note who is at the reunion and who is not. Record numbers are set when a couple with five kids make their first appearance. But another record is set because for the first time two of my mother-in-law's grandchildren are missing because they live out-of-state. Both have called their parents, requesting reunion updates and sad that they will not be at the township hall.

In my family, I go months without seeing anyone from my family, weeks without calls, days without Facebook updates or emails. My husband calls his mother almost daily, commutes frequently with his oldest brother, and sees all of his siblings at least once a week.

Perhaps it is because since 1975 my family has been scattered across states and until 2007, all of his family lived within 20 minutes of each other.

Is it that difference in families or a fear of helicopters that allows 474 miles to separate my daughter and I?

Is it time to change my line from get a job first to what are you waiting for - an engraved invitation?

Is it past time to make room in my home to match the room in my heart?

After all, my daughter wants to come home.